I came across a very good article this week on dealing with trauma, both from the perspective of one who suffers it as well as from providing some helpful understanding for those who love us when we grieve.
A New Normal: Ten Things I've Learned About Trauma, by Catherine Woodiwiss
Friday, January 24, 2014
Monday, January 13, 2014
Loving him in eternity
January 11, 2014
Yesterday morning I corresponded with one of Daniel's friends from high school, Ellie, a young woman who lives out of state with another young woman who is also a member of this circle. And then yesterday evening, we hosted our annual party for Daniel's inner circle of friends, the Fab, and their families.
Both occasions caused me to pause and reflect again on why these relationships and connections continue to be so compelling to us.
My morning email to Ellie included this observation about why I thought these relationships had such power and meaning for us:
"Though very bittersweet at times these relationships are very important and meaningful to us perhaps partly because they help us continue to acknowledge how much we loved Daniel on this earth and love him still in eternity."
"Acknowledging how much we loved Daniel on this earth and how we love him still in eternity" seems to sum it up well.
Our love for Daniel continues and we have to find ways to express it. Being with these young adults, the friends and mentors who loved Daniel so deeply and powerfully shaped and enriched his final years on earth, provides one very important outlet into which we can continue pouring our love.
As we interact with them, celebrating their new relationships and milestones (college graduations, new jobs, engagements, and weddings), we get to continue to engage the relationships and people who were most connected to Daniel in his final years.
Somehow in all this joy and the laughter, hugs and occasional tears, we are loving Daniel as well, missing him desperately on this earth in this moment, but also loving him in eternity at the very same time.
Yesterday morning I corresponded with one of Daniel's friends from high school, Ellie, a young woman who lives out of state with another young woman who is also a member of this circle. And then yesterday evening, we hosted our annual party for Daniel's inner circle of friends, the Fab, and their families.
Both occasions caused me to pause and reflect again on why these relationships and connections continue to be so compelling to us.
My morning email to Ellie included this observation about why I thought these relationships had such power and meaning for us:
"Though very bittersweet at times these relationships are very important and meaningful to us perhaps partly because they help us continue to acknowledge how much we loved Daniel on this earth and love him still in eternity."
"Acknowledging how much we loved Daniel on this earth and how we love him still in eternity" seems to sum it up well.
Our love for Daniel continues and we have to find ways to express it. Being with these young adults, the friends and mentors who loved Daniel so deeply and powerfully shaped and enriched his final years on earth, provides one very important outlet into which we can continue pouring our love.
As we interact with them, celebrating their new relationships and milestones (college graduations, new jobs, engagements, and weddings), we get to continue to engage the relationships and people who were most connected to Daniel in his final years.
Somehow in all this joy and the laughter, hugs and occasional tears, we are loving Daniel as well, missing him desperately on this earth in this moment, but also loving him in eternity at the very same time.
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